Don't Focus Only on the Orgasm
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Orgasm (for most people) is such a salient part of the act that it becomes easy to make it into the one thing that defines good sex. However, when people get hyper-focused on getting themselves or their partner to climax, their behavior can do the exact opposite. "The best way to have an orgasm is not to require one," says Etkes. He adds that there are plenty of people out there who have very satisfying sex sans orgasm.