This summer, the World Cup comes to Brazil, the country that perfected the "Beautiful Game." You know what we say to that? Blah, blah blah, blah blah. A rich tradition of excellence is great and all, but the best way to get into soccer is to take an aggressive dislike to someone on not-your-team. You can have your fancy passing and your gorgeous freekicks; we'd rather spend our time screaming at these 14 divers, cheaters, and all-around dirtbags.
Team Portugal, Portugal
Portugal, who the U.S. faces in its second group game, has skill but lacks anything resembling likeability. Ronaldo, the reigning World Player of the Year, can laser a free kick one moment, then have a dive-off with countryman Nani the next. Pepe is extraordinarily effective – no less so given the fact that he rarely seems interested in the ball. Think of Portugal as a team of teenage girls. If they’re winning, they’re going to be a lot of fun to be around. If they’re losing, it’s going to be miserable for all considered. On second thought, that may be unfair to a lot of 16 year olds.
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