Adventures With Your Kids: Advice for Every Age

The Baby Years (First 2 Years)

The sole benefit of traveling with a child this young is that — at least for the first year — you don’t have to buy them a seat. People travel overseas with infants, often out of necessity, but if soothing nine pounds of screaming, pooping, and vomiting through 18-hours in coach doesn’t sound like fun to you, skip it. Honestly, your kid is not going to remember anything from the experience, anyway. One other thing to consider is that babies have little built-up immunity. Travel is a germ-centric activity, so if your baby is at all immunocompromised, do not travel.

Finally, know that disposable diapers, while almost always available, are not always plentiful or affordable. Wheeler says that many families stock up in major cities because they can be hard to find in rural areas. Either way, know that you’ll pay dearly for them and probably want to stretch out uses to conserve what you can get.

Activities to Introduce: Hiking (carried or pushed), push biking

The Pre-K Years (3-5 Years Old)

“By this age their language development is so advanced and they’re thinking complex thoughts and have good motor skills, so it’s a good time to travel,” says Dr. Spinks-Franklin. Your kids are now old enough to weigh in on plans and learn the basic history of the place your visiting. They should also be helping by rolling their own suitcases and doing some of their own packing, says Spinks-Franklin.

One caveat though: Any big, transcontinental-trip needs to be planned around potty training.

Dr. Spinks-Franklin says that you can take a child on a transcontinental flight before you start or after your child is totally trained up, but not during. “It’s not fair to potty train during a big life change,” she says, adding that if you do, you can almost certainly expect for your child to regress.

Finally, many parents worry about exposing their children to poverty at this young of an age. Dr. Spinks-Franklin says it’s a non-issue. “I think any age is appropriate for this,” she says, adding that it helps build empathy. Essentially, as soon as your kid grasps the concept of sharing and helping, they’re old enough to also understand empathy, and that’s a perfect time to introduce them to some of the world’s harsh realities. Wheeler agrees; she was surprised by her own children’s lack of reaction to endemic poverty. “When they saw a kid who had almost nothing, all they thought was cool, a playmate!”

Activities to Introduce: Short hikes, climbing, swimming, snorkeling, biking on paths

The Early Elementary School Years (5-8)

These are the years to really get your kids excited about adventures, says Wheeler. “At this age they can follow the rules very well and they realize that they can be part of something bigger than just themselves." Get them active in group activities, like climbing or sailing. This makes safety less about following orders and more about working together. However, you may have to try a few activities before they find one they like. “I wanted my girls to kite surf because I love to kite surf. But they had no interest in it for the longest time,” says Wheeler, which meant getting them to check their setups and follow all the necessary precautions was like pulling teeth. However, “my kids love to climb, they beg to climb. The rules there don’t annoy them.”

Activities to Introduce: Flat water canoeing, sailing, climbing, nature tours, road and mountain biking

The Pre-Tween Years (8-11)

Want to spend a few months seeing the world? Now’s the time to do it. “They don’t need naps and they can go, go, go,” says Wheeler, adding that you’re also going to be free from the confines of the stroller and the requisite bag of snacks and toys that comes standard with every small child. Kids this age are starting to become very independent, so you may need to lay down some ground rules different than those at home. For Wheeler, that meant making sure her kids never went to the bathroom alone in certain places where violence against women is common.

Dr. Spinks-Franklin says that while safety should always be a priority when traveling, up until this age, conversations should be kept abstract. “When kids are young we just say that airport security is there to keep us safe. We don’t talk about 9/11 until upper elementary school ages,” she says. But now, it’s okay to go into more detail if your kids ask — so long as you stress that travel, on a whole, is safe.

Eight to 11 is also when some kids may be able to start flying unaccompanied, so long as an adult is there to greet them on the other side. “If you can leave a child home alone for a couple of hours, and they know to keep the doors locked and how to make a meal for themselves, they can probably fly by themselves,” says Spinks-Franklin. Exceptions to this would be a child who is easily distracted and might wander away from the gate during boarding, or a child who is impulsive and might try to hop another flight. You know your child best, says Spinks-Franklin, so use your judgment.

Activities to Introduce: Rafting (under class III), fly-fishing, camping, stand-up paddleboard

The Tween Years (11-14 Years Old)

Sure, hormones are beginning to kick in, but these can also be some wonderful years for traveling and adventuring with your kids. By this age, your child should be ready to tackle a big adventure, like summiting a (moderately sized) mountain or doing a multiday backpacking trip. They can carry their own gear and go at their own pace with regular regrouping sessions. “Teen and pre-teen is the time for them to do this,” says Wheeler, but she adds that for the most impact, include some sort of service in your adventure — be it hauling out trash or delivering books to kids in remote areas of Tibet.

This is also the age to let your kid do some very controlled exploring on their own, but make sure you have clear safety plans — and know your phones may not work in all places. Wheeler started letting her girls surf on their own rhythm at this age (she’d be in the water too but catching her own waves).

Activities to Introduce: Backpacking, moderate hikes, SCUBA, sailing, caving, safari, surfing

The Teen Years (15-18)

One of the best ways to get your kid to pull their nose out of their phone? Go somewhere where phones don’t work. Your kid may groan and mope before you leave, but trust us, they’ll have fun once you’re abroad. “Give teens a role in the adventure and travel planning,” says Wheeler, otherwise the percentage of eye-rolls to smiles will be hard to handle. And again, she stresses service, which will help your teen feel good about what they’re doing in a country, versus just thinking about all the SnapChat time they’re missing while their phones aren’t working.

Wheeler is hesitant to suggest allowing even the most confident teen too much freedom while abroad, simply because “there’s a lot of child trafficking out there. Exercise caution and only in pairs,” she says about allowing her two to do anything without adults in tow.

Traveling with a group and not with parents can be an enriching experience for a teen too — though it’s hard to book them a ticket overseas without feeling a few pangs of jealousy. Last year, Wheeler took a group of teenage women to Peru for a trek up Machu Pichu. She says the older teens really seemed to get the most out of it, which may be an argument for waiting one more year if you don’t think your teen is quite ready. And make sure both you and your kid feel comfortable with the group and the group leader before they go — the panicked transcontinental "I want to come home" phone call is fun for no one.

Activities to Introduce: Road and mountain biking (solo), surfing, through hikes and summits, triathlons, lead climbing, wilderness first-aid