Why You’ll Never Need the Apple Store’s $90 Smart Jump Rope

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This is dumb. Well, not dumb exactly, but stupid. Go and visit the Geniuses at your local mall, and while you’re trying to get your water-damaged phone fixed — and convincing them you have no idea what’s wrong with it — you can buy the Tangram Factory Smart Rope LED Jump Rope. Sure, it costs $90, but hey, it has LED lights! Sort of like a flashlight! And its handles look sexy as hell! And it works with health apps you hardly use and haven’t been able to delete, and it’s sold in an Apple Store

Now, we love fitness trackers (and wear them all day and night to look at our overall health), and we dig training equipment that can tell us how to improve our tennis or golf swing.

But here’s a fitness Truth: Sweating your ass off doesn’t require a $90 jump rope. Tracking your fitness is a solid way to train smarter, push yourself, and sweat toward specific goals. We get that. But if you want to pick up a jump rope, start with one of these speed ropes (22 bucks!), follow any of these workouts, and just keep jumping until you can’t and you feel like you deserve a beer after this workout because damn you just fucking crushed it. Do it again the next day, this time a little harder. And you don’t need a connected piece of gear to tell you that. 

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