Thinking There’s a Finish Line
When it comes to sex, there is a vast range of preferences. This means that there is no one move that satisfies everyone. “Just because your last partner loved XYZ doesn’t mean your new partner will, or just because you saw a position in a porn scene doesn’t mean that your partner wants to (or doesn’t want to) do it,” says Katz. Along the same vein, do your best to avoid comparing partners. Even if you’re not trying to be hurtful, any level of comparison can sting.
The solution: Talk about what turns you on and what doesn’t. Have conversations outside of the bedroom about it and consider creating some nonverbal ways of giving each other guidance while you’re getting it on. “Discussing how both of you can nurture and enhance your sexual lives together builds your repertoire and treasure chest of fun and excitement,” says Malone.Back to top