Office hotties come in all shapes and sizes, but the most dangerous of all—the one who can really ruin you—isn’t the miniskirted assistant down the hall or that oh-so-vulnerable coworker with cleavage who’s always crying on your shoulder. The Office Hottie who’s sure to bring about your downfall is the one who’s on top: the boss. But don’t despair. When it comes to dealing with the head hottie, there are a few things to know that might help you keep both your manhood and your job.
The pitfall that plagues men with sexy superiors is confusion. Faced with a woman who looks nothing like the boss you envisioned in business school, a lot of guys default to treating her the way they would any other babe—which, as most of you know, doesn’t often win anyone over. So leering at your hot boss, forwarding her dirty jokes, or trying to get her drunk at office parties is probably just going to get you demoted or fired (whether you score or not).
Instead, when you see your beautiful boss for the first time, pick your jaw off the floor and picture your grandma. The hottie is probably so used to guys getting hysterical around her that your composure may just throw her off. Instead of putting you in the box with all of her other male subordinates, she may actually respect you. Whoa.
Once you start off right with your head hottie, be sure to stay strong. Think of it as a relationship—minus the sex—and give her the things you know women want. Do your best around her and don’t compare notes about her with your boys. Remember, you want her to think of you as special, not one of the rabble. So when in doubt—when her blouse accidentally slips open or she stops by for a harmless “discussion” in those killer heels—just avert your eyes, consider what your boys would tell you to do (or say), and do (and say) exactly the opposite.
Think of it this way: The head hottie’s always got her guard up, but if she trusts you—and she will—you’ll be part of her inner circle. And not only does that spell all kinds of raises and promotions, it means a long, intimate relationship with your boss—who also happens to be dropdead gorgeous. Read between the lines, fellas.
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